Just a fortnight ago I experienced something new. It seems to me that the older you get, the potential for totally unique experiences tends to decrease unless you make a dedicated effort to counteract the trend. Thus you have the phenomena of mountain climbers, base jumpers, and what-have-you.

Well, add Roller Derby to that list of exciting diversions. I attended the Tornado Alley Rollergirls’ “It’s A Bout Time” event, featuring Cell Block 9 vs. Valkyrie Vixens and Victory Dolls vs. Homewreckin’ Harlots, and I must say–what an interesting, fun way to spend a Sunday evening, for several reasons.

I-35 winds its way south through the Oklahoma countryside, across rolling hills, flat plains, and through paths carved through the occasional mountainside. In spite of some fairly spectacular scenery, after nearly twenty years of traversing the well-worn path between Oklahoma City and Dallas, the miles seem to blur. The yellow lines stretch to infinity and about the only things that change are the billboards…

On a trip to Dallas last summer, a new billboard sprouted along the side of the road, advertising an “Action Figure Museum” of sorts. Interest sufficiently piqued, I began to recall toys long gone, action figures lost to the pages of time. But, as the toys and figures were forgotten, so were the billboard, and the museum. Until a few months ago.

Wow, Sydney been busy, a new column already! Actually, I have been busy, just not watching movies. These are some of the films that didn’t quite make previous columns or I literally just watched last Friday night. Let’s do this sonofagun. Boy, that’s a phrase that lost what little spark it once had once you could say “bitch” on TV.

Kim Jong Il scurried about his palace, frantically making sure everything was in order. His meeting with Emperor Ming was set to begin shortly and he desperately wanted to make a good impression. If the two could come to an agreement, then no force in the galaxy could stop their domination.

Loki was craving something to eat. His dinner had been paltry and it was still many hours before breakfast. He desperately searched for a snack. Unfortunately, those that dwell among the gods do not enjoy simple foods like the plebeians over which they rule. Everything must be bigger, bolder, better tasting. This brings us to our current situation…