By The Dude
Captain Caveman!

The Dude remembers running around the living room, wearing an orange towel, carrying a cardboard gift-wrap tube, and trying to figure out how to pull a tire out of his belly button. While at the same time jumping from couch to chair to coffee table screaming, “Captain Caaaavvvemaaaannn,” and trying to hit The Dude’s sister. She was obviously some kind of mutant zombie that needed to be exterminated from our beautiful planet. In retrospect, The Dude probably should have let her be one of The Teen Angels.
In case you didn’t have the same wonderful childhood, let The Dude be the first to introduce you to Captain Caveman. If you should become friends he would prefer you to just call him Cavey. Especially if you are a hot chick that dresses like you’re stuck in the seventies.
Cavey has run around with some pretty famous friends over the years. Partly because even though he had his own show for a few short years, (1977-1980), Cavey always worked best in multi-star line ups. The Dude feels it is unfortunate that Cavey and the Teen Angels were mostly used as the half time show at the Superbowl, (Scooby-Doo and Fred Flintstone being the most common teams playing in this analogy.)
One of The Dude’s favorite things about Captain Caveman was his blatant spoof of Superman. Cavey flew, had a cape, and on The Flintstones he even had an alter ego as a reporter that wore glasses. The spoofs did not stop there though. Captain Caveman and the Teen Angels were often compared to Josie and the Pussycats, and Charlie’s Angels. One of the worst knock offs was his van. It looked just like Scooby’s but it had Captain’s cave on top.
Still, how could The Dude not love that furry little freak? He was always gung-ho, and ready to right the wrongs of the world. Whether that world was pre-historic Bedrock, or the Disco era, Cavey was a true superhero. He might have been a little offended by all the comic book superheroes running around with secret identities though, because when the Teen Angels unfroze him in the ‘70’s he did not take up his own secret reporter identity. No he only resurrected his cap and club.
The club is what gives Captain Caveman the ability to fly. The Dude also remembers how basically anything Cavey needed would either pop out off the club or his fur. To top off a magic club, and weird fur, Cavey had super strength. This helped explain how he could pull a semi-truck out off his fur and beat some demon over the head with it.
Most superheroes get one sidekick, and it is usually someone of the same sex. This leads to all kinds of jokes, but in honor of Cavey’s Forrest Gump innocence The Dude will not make any. With his caveman common sense, Cavey was the perfect superhero to get three hot disco chicks as sidekicks. The Teen Angels were Brenda Chance, Taffy Dare and Dee Dee Sykes. Dee Dee was actually a character The Dude can respect. She was an African-American female fighting crime on TV in the 1970’s, and she was the brains of the operation. The other two sidekicks were so stereotypical that Dee Dee probably has been forgotten and lost in the mix.
In 1986 Captain Caveman once again hit up his friend Fred and tried to make a comeback. Unfortunately he violated some child labor laws and all sense of decency by using his son in the shows. The Dude feels it was a pitiful attempt to go for the cute factor. The Dude will choose to forgive Cavey, and blame it on his agent. Since Cavey seems to have an unnatural ability to stay alive, The Dude is sure we will eventually see him again. The Dude just hopes The Teen Angels also get unfrozen in their hip seventies attire too.
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